Sussex Family Mediation Service

Family & Couples Mediation & Counselling Explained

Mediation

What is mediation?
How many meetings are necessary?
How does it work?
Direct consultation with children
Important things you need to know about Mediation
Is mediation suitable for everybody?
Is mediation binding?
What will it cost?

Family Focus

What is Family Focus?

What is mediation?
Mediation is a way to consider and agree the range of decisions which need to be made following the ending of a relationship. For example, arrangements for children and finance and property.

Mediation can address children's issues alone, or property and finance, or All Issues Mediation.

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How many meetings are necessary?
You will be offered an initial meeting to consider mediation. Mediation will only begin if, after this initial meeting, you both decide that this is what you want to do.

Once mediation begins the average number of meetings are as follows:

Children's Issues Mediation (Parenting Plans)                      2 - 3 meetings
All Issues Mediation (Finance, Property, + Parenting Plans) 3 - 5 meetings

These meetings take between 1.5 and 2 hours each.

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How does it work?

In a number of joint meetings a trained mediator will help you:

  • Gather together the necessary information
  • Discuss your main goals and views about fairness
  • Look at all options
  • Reach an agreement which suits your circumstances

At the end a mediator will write a summary of your agreed proposals.

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Direct consultation with children

At SFMS our mediator's are trained to work with children as well as adults. If both parents are willing for us to meet with their children, and the child is also willing, a session can be arranged for them to come in. The children then tell us what they would like to be fed back to their parents, which is then communicated at a later session. This can be really helpful in shaping a parental agreement regarding children's arrangements.

Research findings in Australia have shown that involving children in the mediation process can help them cope far better with parental separation, and enable them to feel that they have had the opportunity to have their feelings listened to.

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Important things you need to know about Mediation

  • No one can be forced to use mediation, it is your choice
  • Mediators do not take sides
  • Mediators do not make the decisions for you or judge you
  • Mediators help you decide
  • Your discussions in mediation are confidential, except in cases where there are significant child safety concerns
  • Financial facts you share together in mediation are open
  • Financial facts you share together in mediation may be used in Court

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Is mediation suitable for everybody?

Sometimes mediation may not be suitable e.g.

  • If you would not feel safe in the same room as your ex-partner
  • If finance and property is being considered it may not be suitable if:
  • you strongly believe your ex-partner is likely to withhold financial information
  • you, or your ex-partner are involved in bankruptcy proceedings

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Is mediation binding?
No, but your proposals can be made binding as a Deed of Separation or Consent Order of Court. Your legal adviser will help you do this.

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What will it cost?
Mediation is free if you are eligible for Public Funding, if not our fees apply.

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Family Focus

Family Focus provides support to couples, families and young people. We offer a private, quiet space for you to talk and make plans for the future.

You can choose to focus your discussions on:

  • Your relationship with your husband, wife or partner
  • Your relationship with your children
  • Sorting things out with your parents
  • Your family, or step family, and the way it works as a unit

If you are not sure what you need to focus on we offer an initial consultation to help you decide.

As with our mediation service we will not judge you, take sides, or talk to other people about what you tell us, unless children are at risk.

Please call us on 01273 550563

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